Dear Relena (and the GW boys)
by Molly Preston
Summary: Ever wonder why Relena rides around in a pink limo? Well, now you can ask her! Any and all questions for the GW boys are accepted, or you can ask their advice. *Rating for a few minor swear words.
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimers: hmph... even with all my fabulous attempts to get gw, i still don't own it...  
  
A/N: Lia is my characterized self.  
  
Anyways, this is, as the title infers, an Ask Relena fic. However, I will gladly take questions for Duo and Heero and anyone else. Relena bashers are quite welcome to review. (Not that I don't like her)  
  
You send 'em, I'll answer 'em. (Or rather, the gw boys and Relena will.) 


	2. Finally, questions and answers!

=next question=  
Thalia Poet:  
Questions for Relena: Well, of course, I wanna know about that pink limo... secondly, have you ever peed in a sandbox? (Sorry. I don't know where that came from. Heehee... mental image!)  
  
Lia: Okay Relena, question number one for you: Why do you ride around in a pink limo?  
  
Relena: Well, you see, pink reflects more light, both real and artificial, therefore giving a shiny and overall quite glossy appearance. No really, if I didn't ride around in a pink limosuine, what sort of example would I be setting for all the nice young ladies out there who fantasize about being queen of the world someday?  
  
Lia: O-kay...anyways, question number two... Have you ever peed in a sandbox?  
  
Relena: No, my parents sent to boarding school to learn to be a lady for no reason at all. I'm being sarcastic. There was that time in kindergarten...   
  
Lia: I know some people I could ask that question to! ::glares accusingly at Duo::  
  
Duo: ::twiddles thumbs:: I HAD to go!! The bathroom was all the way on the other side of the playground!! My bladder was about ready to combust!  
  
Everyone: O.o()  
  
=next question=  
Maria Khushrenada:  
Hi Relena, are you really believe in absolute pacifism, or its just because its your duty to continue family legacy?  
  
Relena: Finally, an easy question. Now for an easy answer. I believe in absolute pacifism. I mean, do you really think I would've risked my life so many lifes just to carry on a dumb family legacy?   
  
=next question=  
tempestwing  
dear relena,  
how come you talk so much and why do you keep following heero?  
  
Relena: I do not consider myself a constant talker. I simply find that mindless babbling and pointless chattering is perfectly necessary to complete my 'spoiled princess soon to be queen of the world' image. And about Heero. If you knew an outrageously cute (not to mention insane) boy was trying to kill you, wouldn't you follow him everywhere he went to make sure he fulfilled his words? I mean, sheesh, these are some pretty obvious answers I'm giving you.  
  
Lia: don't mind her... all that pink is finally affecting her brain...  
  
=next question=  
tenshiamanda  
hi ya!   
erm..... relena i have to say that all that pink makes me sick so are you considering giving the limo a paint job?  
heero you are really hot and what made you put angel wings on wing zero? (i love those)wufei have you ever been slapped by women for your erm.... attitude towards them?  
  
Lia: So here are three questions, and here are the three answers, respectively:  
  
Relena: ::strikes a meditation pose:: Pink is good for the body and the soul.  
  
Lia: O.o  
  
Heero: I am hot?   
  
Duo: Shinigami's hot too, i mean, being from hell and all...  
  
Heero: Back to me. I like angels. Angels are pretty, and they don't run around yelling 'Heero!! Come and kill me!'. And they don't wear pink, either. So of course I would pattern w-zero after angels. I mean, think of how it would look if I patterned it after Relena? ::mental image of wing zero with a wreath of roses and a pink dress::  
  
Wufei: Of course I have. Why do you think my attitude towards them is like it is?  
  
=next question=  
Maiden Genisis  
Relena who picks your.....erm...."interesting" wardrobe? Relena who picked the ...um... school uniform? Relena why are you a baka pshyco bitch?  
Dou why do ya dress like a vicar? Dou why do ya call Wu-man Wu-man?  
Wu-man why do ya hate girls? Wu-man why do ya hate being called Wu-man cos it's cool? (at least it's not as bad as chicken feathers! don't ask!)  
Heero are ya single? Heero would ya go out with me?  
Trowa why does your hair defy gravity? Trowa why do ya barely talk?  
Quatra why are ya so polite? Quatre why do ya blush so much?  
Why are all of you g-boys so hot?  
  
Lia: What an assortment of questions! This is just fabulous! Let's take on one person at a time.  
  
Relena: The answer for the first question is 'me'. Thank you for describing it as 'interesting'. The school uniform was picked by the superintendent of the school. As for question number three...well... I think I can accept the 'baka' part, and just MAYBE the 'psycho' part, but you've gone just a bit to far with the last part. I'm officially offended.  
  
Lia: All that pink is really getting to her... Duo's question is next...  
  
Duo: ::blank look:: what's a vicar...? I call Wufei 'Wu-man' because it bothers him. It's ten times funner to aggrevate someone when the're easily annoyed ^__~.  
  
Wufei: ::trying to ignore previous comments made by everyone's favorite braided-baka:: Who says I hate girls? Just because I'm not nice to them doesn't mean I don't like them. And being called 'Wu-man' is a insult. Would you want to be called that? I much prefer 'chicken feathers'.  
  
Heero: I would like to be single, but a certain someone won't allow me to be. (She would have a fit if I went out with you!) Thanks for officially offending her for me!  
  
Trowa: I defy gravity too! Remember all those cool flips and stuff I did? ::suddenly remembers he's not supposed to be a socialable person:: '...'  
  
Quatre: All twenty-nine of my sisters have been to boarding school to learn how to be polite. It kinda tends to rub off after fifteen years...  
  
All the gw boys: ::blink blink:: we are hot?  
  
=next question=  
Abi (KawaiiKiawe)  
Ne, Wufei-baka, when is yours and Ami-chan's wedding? I need to pick out the decorations and send out invitations.   
Heero- where exactly do you keep your gun?   
  
- Abi  
  
PS: Should I post Koneko or just keep working with chapter1?  
  
Lia: Okay, I'm not Molly Preston or Lia, my name is Ami. And yes, at one time, I did have a crush on Wufei ::dodges tomatoes:: But we are SO over. I have a real live boyfriend now!!   
  
Heero: Ah, the satisfaction of having a secret!  
  
Ami: All right everyone, my best friend Abi is an author too, and she needs lots of encouragement. She has several great stories all you would LOVE to read, but she's not brave enough to post them. Everybody, email Abi and tell her she needs to post Koneko, but to also keep up with her fic 'Gandalin' (Great story, BTW, a spoiler is online, r&r it to help out my favorite tamodachi!) Please remember that this is not just 'Ask Relena', but that you can ask ANY of the GW-pplz questions. Like the one about Duo peeing in a sandbox. (Now THAT makes a good mental image!) Make sure you keep the questions coming, and don't forget to email Abi!! Bye!! 


	3. CHAPTER 3!!

Ami: Hullo everyone! Thanks for all the questions, and try to be nice to Relena (she's still officially offended).  
  
____  
KawaiiKiawe  
Anyway, my have nuther question(s)  
(1) Relena- Have you always been insane or has Heero's less then lovely traits rubbed off on you?   
(2) Trowa- Can I call you "Shizuka" since it seems to fit you more then "Trowa"?  
(3) Duo- What is your relationship with Hilde?  
(4) Quatre- ::tries to think of question:: hmm... can't think of any. Oh well ::huggles him::  
(5) Ami- Boyfriend...? WHO IS HE!? Tellmetellmetellmetellme!!!!!  
  
- Abi  
  
PS: it ain't JD is it? Heh, dumb question.  
____  
  
(1) Relena: ::not talking, as she is still officially offended::  
  
Ami: Umm... you might try asking her mother...   
  
(2) Trowa: Shizuka? I prefer Nanashi...  
  
(3) Duo: We like each other, but it's never been anything serious. I do owe her my life, though. (At the end of Japanese Endless Watlz, she keeps me from choking on a donut.)  
  
(4) Quatre: O.o  
  
(5) Ami: Just a second! This is 'Ask Relena and the GW boys', not 'Ask Relena and the GW boys, but don't forget to inquire about Ami's boyfriend'. Sheesh!! Next question:  
____  
Bill  
To Relena: Do you plan on having kids with Heero?  
  
To Heero: Do you think your going to have kids with Relena.  
____  
Relena: Forget being offended, I can answer this one: H*ll yes!  
  
Heero: H*ll no!  
  
Ami: O.o next question...  
  
____  
Maiden Genisis   
Yes boys you are hot! Dou a vicar is like a reverand (I can't spell it!) or a priest but they can get married! Come on ya lived in a church! (oops! I just answered my own question!)Wufei if ya want I'll call ya chiken feathers but it's Vicki's nickname for me already!   
Relena do you realise I was insulting your horrific fashion sense?   
Dou why do ya call yourself the god of death?  
Guys can I kill Relena?  
On second thought why haven't ya killed Relena yet? (I would've within an hour of meeting her and only if I was in a forgiving and happy mood!)  
Quatre did your sisters use ya as a human dress up doll? (That's what my brother was for when I was little!)  
Everyone what was your most embarassing moment ever?  
(If ya want to ask me stuff feel free to do so!)  
gotta go, luv MG ^.^   
  
All GW boys: Thanks a lot, we love compliments!  
  
Duo: Thanks for informing me...  
  
Wufei: I prefer Wufei, but 'chicken feathers' is fine...  
  
Relena: YES I REALIZE THAT, THAT'S WHY I'M SO OFFENDED!!!!!!  
  
Duo: Well, 'God of McDonald's' was already taken, thanks to that stupid Ronald, and 'God of Death' was my second choice.  
  
Guys: Ami told us to be nice to her, but still... anyways, she is quite crucial to the plot of Gundam Wing, and we certainly can't kill her now, because then this fic couldn't be called 'Ask Relena', could it?  
  
Quatre: Umm, no...   
  
Ami: You go, Maiden Genesis! Brothers are the worstest!!  
  
Duo: My most embarassing moment was last session, when Relena accused me of peeing in a sandbox. Pretty darn awful, if you ask me...  
  
Ami: As for the other guys, they are too embarassed to talk about their most embarassing moment... NEXT QUESTION:  
____   
xamik:  
Heylo,  
Wufei Why do you have problems with woman? Does it have anything to do with your late wife? (episode Zero)  
Relena: Have you ever been to a shrink? You need one. Did you know people have websites fanfics and thoughts of hating you?(most of them are really cool) Out of all the people why Heero? No offense to him but he's a sucidal manic who had threatened to kill you? You are such a moron. Relena-san desu baka!   
Quatre: Will you go out with me?  
Trowa:I need your brand of hair gel. My friend would look so kawaii with her like yours. (i know u use hair gel)  
____  
  
Wufei: Well, if women would take the time to be nice (hint hint), I might actually like them. I mean, Sally was nice, and I like her a lot.  
  
Relena: I AM SO SICK AND TIRED OF RELENA-BASHING!!! CAN'T ANYONE EVER BE NICE!!! And you're asking me why I like Heero? Have you not seen all those Heero fanfics out there? I am not the only Heero lover in the world, ya know.  
  
Quatre: No, sorry. I'm a busy guy, and I make it a point not to go out with people who don't have weird eyebrows. Do you have weird eyebrows?  
  
Trowa: I believe it's something called 'Extra-Strength Romafellar Goo'. Did you know the Romafellar Foundation now makes a full line of hair sprays and gels? They come in cute little bottles shaped like the Wing Gundam!!  
  
Ami: Well there you have it!! Keep those questions coming, and try to be a bit nicer to Relena. ^_^ tnx a lot!! 


End file.
